Read the latest from our columnist, transformational counsellor and blogger, Lisa Bent. Check in with Lisa each month, right here, where she’ll be writing about personal development, mental health, social issues and a whole lot more…
As we head into the last quarter of the year, it’s a great time to reflect on where you are at. See the last three months of 2018 as the last slice of your favourite cake that you just cannot wait to devour. Whether you use your hands and go all in, or whether you use a fork to cut it into small pieces, it doesn’t matter because there is no right or wrong way. What counts is the want, passion and the action.
Metaphors are great especially when talking about goals because the vision needs to be clear and appealing. The voice that talks you out of going to the gym, is the same voice that will tell you why your goal is crap. Any voice that leads you away from growth, is fighting for you to stay in your comfort zone. Let those words pass through you like a sieve and keep moving towards your end goal.
One slice left. The majority of us are guilty of assuming we will wake up to see another day. Tomorrow is not guaranteed for any of us, deep down we know this yet often only truly acknowledge it when we are faced with sickness or illness in ourselves or our loved ones. Auto-pilot living can most definitely make you forget that the most precious thing on Earth is the thing money cannot buy. Life.
Regardless of whether you believe in something or not, I believe we all make a difference by sharing our personalities and gifts. We cannot take it with us, so it is our born right to express it all and leave it behind for others to enjoy and be positively affected.
Faith and dreams
In the past I have been obsessed with questions such as if you don’t birth your ideas, do they wait for you? Or do numerous people get given the same idea in the hope that someone will birth the idea?
In my experience, it is the latter. I have had many ideas which I have begun and didn’t materialise, only to see someone else do it years later. It hurt, but served as a reminder that faith in an idea is important and an idea is only an idea until it is birthed.
Ego makes us believe that we are the only person the idea was given to. The world is full of ideas to be created, are you bold enough to create the whisper, the light bulb moment?
I believe dreams are attached to you and it really doesn’t matter if other people have a similar vision. For example, there are many presenters, footballers and astronauts, don’t let that stop you from your own dreams. The vision may be the same, but your personality, experience, style and journey is your unique selling point. Do dreams wait for you? I think they do, but depending on the profession, time, age and health, may play a factor in a timeline.
October is Black History Month in the UK and it is a time when we acknowledge and celebrate those who have contributed in numerous ways. However, I have always thought about the generations before and my ancestors who weren’t able to do their passions or live their dreams because the very idea was a luxury. Survival and surviving was at the top of the list. The sacrifices they made were necessary, and the true impact on their mental health and soul as many dreams remained just that, dreams, will never be known.
Whilst the struggle today is nowhere near what my ancestors went through, there have been blocks along the way due to institutional racism. The glass ceiling is often spoken about, but you would have to be in the building and on one floor down to even know a glass ceiling above exists.
The right to thrive
In current times, the gender pay gap is acknowledged but the discussion about the difference in pay between white women and women of colour hasn’t even begun. The ability to live comfortably has been one of struggle for many, especially without generational wealth and all this before I even touch on broken dreams due to prejudice.
It is everyone’s birthright to thrive and so I hope this serves as a reminder to get your cake and eat it. Acknowledge your self-talk cannot be trusted. Acknowledge that the world isn’t equal and still go out and get yours. It’s time, in fact, it is overdue.
What does the last slice of 2018 look like for you? What does your 2019 cake look like? Think about it and then make it 10 times bigger and more calorific.
You have one life, think big and make it happen, you deserve to thrive. Be the baker and eat the cake every day until it’s all gone and then visualise, bake and repeat.
Good luck on the journey to your best self.