The latest from our columnist, transformational counsellor and blogger, Lisa Bent.
The weather receives the signal to be slightly crisper. The leaves know it’s time to transition from vibrant green to rustic gold. Yes, autumn has officially arrived in the UK and like clockwork, everything else has adapted.
I love autumn, but I have always hated winter because I am not built for this harsh British weather. However, I acknowledge I never wear enough layers, hence I am always cold. You would think I would learn from this, but this is an example of what denial and a reluctance to adapt looks like. As a result, my experience of this seasonal change is horrible and I dread it. I know change is coming yet I don’t prepare
Change is inevitable, it happens constantly, but it is how we view the change, that truly determines how well we adapt to it.
Switch on the TV in the morning and listen to the language of the weather presenters as they talk about the weather:
Today is grey and cold, a far cry from yesterday
It will be gloomy
It’s a miserable rainy day
It will be sunny but too hot
It’s as if the weather just can’t win, and no matter how it behaves we are never happy. It’s easy to let language like this weave its way into our subconscious ensuring we leave the house in an absolute funk. I am convinced that if they read the weather differently it would have a positive knock-on effect on our day.
If we had no rain, we would moan about a drought, if we had too much rain we would moan about floods. We get what the earth needs which is why, like the seasons, the weather changes. Yesterday may have been blazing hot and today it may be raining because water is needed to quench the soil’s thirst.
Humans are creatures of comfort, however the most successful are those who can adapt well to changing situations. The key is to work with what you are presented with head-on. Knowledge and willingness are needed. Resistance and a reluctance to see the changed situation creates a fog that hangs over you and eventually sets in and clouds your vision and clarity.
We tend to panic in new situations because we are either working from the past and the outcome that occurred then, or too far forward whilst dragging the feelings and outcome of the past with us. The present is now, right now, and in that moment we only have to make the best decision for the situation now, using wisdom and our internal and external resources. If it’s raining outside grab your umbrella or raincoat. If it’s very sunny, grab your glasses and sunscreen. The rain isn’t wrong for raining and the sun isn’t wrong for shining, it is just doing what it is meant to do.
Once you become aware of what you are telling yourself, you can tell yourself a different story. I can now view winter in a different way. It is so picturesque when I wake up and look outside of my window to see an untouched blanket of snow. The smell of cinnamon immediately warms me up and there is nothing like being in a gastro-pub with a fire burning surrounding by friends having a natter.
Like the spiders who have decided to hibernate in my room for warmth (which I understand but I am sorry, they will not be staying there) I have invested in an uber-warm coat, so that when the weather changes, I have the right attire to enjoy the season. Regardless, change is going to happen. So choose your experience. There are some changes you can prepare for and others you will have to go with the flow when it arrives.
Reflecting how you are with the seasons, can be a window to view how you deal with change in your life right now and in general. Sometimes we need to look out to see the synchronicity within. Everything is a mirror. What are you now seeing?
The clocks go back soon, but that doesn’t mean you have to. Keep reflecting and digging for growth, because all the answers lie within.
Good luck on the journey towards your best self!
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